


No Thoughts, Head Empty

by etherealyou



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Kissing, M/M, Mention Cho Seungyoun, Mentioned Cha Junho - Freeform, Mentioned Han Seungwoo, Mentioned Kang Minhee, Mentioned Song Hyeongjun, eunpyo are cute fight me, literally product of me being starved off x1 contents, why is x1 already jobless ffs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 08:20:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21267941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/etherealyou/pseuds/etherealyou
Summary: “I saw them kissing.”The sound of flipping pages stops. Dongpyo’s picking at the threads of his worn-out blanket, eyes not meeting the other boy’s.“Okay… and who are they?” Eunsang says slowly, closing the textbook he’d been furiously flipping through. Chemistry exam doesn’t seem that important anymore.“You know…” the smaller starts, throwing his body on the bed, gaze trailing over the littered glow in the dark stickers of stars in various sizes, “Seungwoo hyung and Seungyoun hyung.”





	No Thoughts, Head Empty

**Author's Note:**

> the title is just me the whole time i'm writing this fic. i am losing my mind.  
if no one's going to provide me with eunpyo content then i'm gonna make one myself god damn it.  
also, I wrote this fic in comic sans because apparently it can help with writer's block and stuff and IT'S ALL LIE I TELL YOU.   
(No, for real it might help a lot of writers but because I'm me so it doesn't work, I guess. ;-;)

“I saw them kissing.” 

The sound of flipping pages stops. Dongpyo’s picking at the threads of his worn-out blanket, eyes not meeting the other boy’s. 

“Okay… and who are they?” Eunsang says slowly, closing the textbook he’d been furiously flipping through. Chemistry exam doesn’t seem that important anymore. 

“You know…” the smaller starts, throwing his body on the bed, gaze trailing over the littered glow in the dark stickers of stars of various sizes, “Seungwoo hyung and Seungyoun hyung.” 

Everyone knows how Dongpyo looks up to Seungwoo hyung. Being an only child and having busy parents made the older the sole role model for the highschooler. What not everyone knows, however, is that the younger’s admiration has turned into something more since god knows when. Only the closest of Dongpyo’s friends know this, and none of them supports his obsession. (He’s way too old for you. He can even adopt you and be your legal dad.” Hyeongjun earned a pinch to the stomach for this. Junho quietly nods, unbothered by a shrieking Hyeongjun and a yelling Minhee trying to pull Dongpyo away). 

Eunsang remembers the day Dongpyo told him about how Seungwoo hyung had been bringing his friend home often. A ‘cool huyng with a lot of cool tattoos’, the smaller described. Around this time, Eunsang would catch small scribbles on Dongpyo’s forearm when he forgot to roll down the sleeves of his school uniform. Sometimes the scribbles were just words that Eunsang couldn’t make out of, but oftentimes they were small doodles with colorful markers. Honestly, he really liked the colors in the expanse of Dongpyo’s pale arms but he never said anything of it. 

“Seungwoo hyung stuck those stars for me. I’m not tall enough to reach the ceiling even with our stepladder.” The younger is pulled out of his thoughts by the smaller’s voice. He realized that he must’ve been quiet for a considerable amount of time now. This always happens. While Dongpyo and Hyeongjun are the ‘no filter’ duo, Eunsang is the type of person who thinks a lot before speaking. Often times, he ends up not saying anything, preferring to keep his thoughts to himself. 

“Did they look happy?” is the only response Eunsang can think of. 

“I guess.. they were giggling.” Eunsang lies on his stomach, one palm supporting his chin, the other finding its way to Dongpyo’s hair spread on the yellow bedsheet. “Isn’t it a good thing then? You always say how happy you are to see Seungwoo hyung happy.” “I should’ve been happy. But for the first time, I didn’t. I don’t know what I felt, but it didn’t feel nice, Eunsang-ah.” The shorter turns his head, staring at Eunsang “Like I ate too much for dinner.” 

They’re quiet after that. Only the soft sound of air conditioner thrumming is heard in the small room. Eunsng’s hand doesn’t leave Dongpyo’s silky hair, playing with the strands softly. He knows that feeling of getting sick from eating too much. He has experienced that a lot of times, especially during the Christmas and thanksgiving. But he didn’t know that you can use that feeling to describe a heartbreak. 

“I wonder how it feels like to kiss Seungwoo hyung.” This time, Eunsang’s hand stops moving. A frown made its way to his face, “Probably like any other kiss? They’re just lips…” to be fair, humans have objectively similar pair of lips. With that in mind, kissing should be an experience that is not that different from one person to another. 

“But I’ve never kissed anyone.” Dongpyo deadpans. The other gasps, feeling betrayed, “You said that you, and I quote, ‘made out ‘till my lips went numb’ with that exchange student last summer camp!” The sound of Hyeongjun's gagging is still clear in his memory when Dongpyo told them about his ‘graphic’ makeout experience. Junho had to pinch Dongpyo’s lips shut together to stop the smaller from traumatizing everyone. 

“Did you really believe that? oh my god. I was just annoying Hyeongjun because he wouldn’t shut up about how that one counselor hyung helped him during archery.” He laughs, dangling legs swinging from the edge of the bed. 

“Your lips were really red, though,” _And also swollen. _

“They’re always red.” 

“I guess.” 

“Eunsang-ah.” Dongpyo turns on his side, eyes filled with a mischievous excitement. This is a signature look to the smaller. All stupidities they did in their circle of friends always started with this look. “Would you kiss me?” 

The words do not register in his brain for a few moments. He just blinks slowly, trying to focus on a wild strand of hair on top of Dongpyo’s head. When he blinks again, his eyes land on the smaller’s lips. Ever so plump, ever so red. He gulps. This is a hard question for Eunsang. Sure he likes Dongpyo as much as he likes his other friends (maybe he likes Dongpyo a little bit more but we’re not discussing that right now) and he wouldn’t mind kissing him. He is an objectively kissable person. But would he kiss his friends? Perhaps. But that would be weird, right? Why would he kiss his friends? So- 

“But why?” he asks lamely. 

Dongpyo rolls his eyes and huffs as if it was a question with an obvious answer to it, “What do you mean why? That was a yes or no question.” 

_Well yes, but actually no. _

“I mean, I don’t mind kissing you…” Eunsang starts, “But like… for what reason?” 

The smaller doesn’t answer his question right away. Dongpyo physically deflates as a pout makes its way to his lips. Eunsang looks away, deciding to look at the way Dongpyo’s fingers playing with the hem of his shorts instead. 

“I’m just curious, I guess.” The mind of the ever so analytical and logical Lee Eunsang short-circuited right that moment. People say ‘curiosity killed the cat’ and Eunsang would argue that the rest of the saying goes ‘but satisfaction brought it back’. He’s made a decision and sits up. 

“Okay, up.” 

“Wait what really?” That sparks on his eyes lights up again. Dongpyo scrambles to sit on the bed, legs crossed. He pulls a pillow to his lap, bouncing with excitement. 

“Close your eyes.” 

Dongpyo blinks owlishly, “Why?” 

“I don’t know just do it!” Eunsang flails his arms.

“Jeez, okay.” 

This is going too fast, everything’s going way too fast. This is how Peter Parker must’ve felt when he’s getting his spider senses. Eunsang is suddenly hyperaware of everything. Of how Dongpyo’s hugging a pillow to his chest, of how Dongpyo’s eyelashes cast a shadow to his soft cheeks, of how his insides seem to be playing gymnastics and since when did the temperature become so low, oh god? 

He scoots closer, palms on the bed on the sides of Dongpyo’s hips. He can feel the smaller’s warm breath on his own face before their lips touch. The other flinch a little upon contact before relaxing. It’s not much. Just lips on lips. Dongpyo’s lips are as soft as he imagined it would. They stay that way for a few seconds before Eunsang pulls back. He watches the way Dongpyo opens his eyes slowly. 

“So..” 

“Hm…” This time, Dongpyo is the one scooting closer to him after removing the pillow on his lap. One palm cupping the taller’s cheek and the other resting on his knee. Eunsang watches as the smaller looks up at him, eyes trailing down to his lips before closing the distance. Dogpyo’s lips taste like the melona they just had after school. Eunsang decides to take back what he said about kissing. Kissing is amazing, at least kissing Dongoyo is amazing. It feels like the kind of relief you feel when you were about to drown. He feels safe and warm. And soft. Dongpyo is soft, soft- 

Eunsang almost chased Dongpyo’s lips when he pulls away. Panicking because it almost feels like someone just let go of his hands and lets him drown again. His eyes instantly land on the other’s slightly parted lips when he opens them. He catches Dongpyo’s hand that had been cupping his face and holds it. 

“Do you want some drink?” the smaller says while fixing Eunsang’s hair with his other hand. Tone oddly calm and steady.

_No I just want to hold your hand._

“Yeah.” He replies quietly. 

Dongpyo pats his head before standing up and getting out of the room. Eunsang lets out a long breath, laying down on the bed. His heart feels way too big for his floating body. His head feels light, seemingly empty. A realization comes upon Eunsang that unsuspecting Thursday afternoon.

  


_ I have a crush._   


**Author's Note:**

> I am not a writer, I write when I'm really frustrated and wow stanning x1 reduced my lifespan by 10 years. a blessing and a curse, if you ask me. i need more eunpyo content and dongpyo content. well, x1 content in general as i am malnourished. please spread this eunpyo agenda.


End file.
